After a long blogging hibernation, I felt I had to share this one with you all. I was listening to a podcast from my sister-in-law’s church in Charlotte NC when this story was told, which originated from her husband. I laughed very loudly and publicly when I heard it and I’m still giggling now…
There’s a youth pastor who’s gone to a pentecostal church event in Georgia. This youth pastor is particularly hefty. Just a really big guy. Anyway, the meeting is progressing as one would expect. Towards the end of the meeting, things are starting to heat up a bit and people are praying and casting out spirits and all sorts. One woman in particular is getting right into this. She’s calling out spirits and demons left, right and centre.
She walks up to the very large youth pastor and says, “Spirit of obesity, in the name of Jesus, I command you to come out right now!”
The youth pastor (a particularly sharp witted guy) puts on a demonic, raspy voice and says…
“I will for a cookie!”
My friend James blogged about his blog stats and the popularity of his Dark Knight post. I decided to check out where things ore going on my stats and was pretty much horrified to see the following –
How ludicrous is that??
Yes, folks, the Free Church of Scotland has clearly lost the plot. Not only are they employing wild and crazy left-wing-commy ministers, ministers with beards, and have put Mark Driscoll on the front of the Monthly Record, now they’ve gone completely bonkers and have actually employed a Jedi Knight.
Apparently, a FCYA outreach to Dagobah planted a seed in the heart of one youngling who has now not only left being a Padwan behind, this fully-fledged Jedi Master even has his own blog.
The Free Church College has refused to comment on the subject of Jedi appointments, although articles are expected in the Gazette and the WHFP any day now…
My friend James worryingly informs me that someone just arrived at his blog by using the search terms “Iain MacKinnon Antichrist”…
The chickens have apparently come home to roost.
Argh! Oi bin tagged!!
My friend Karen has decided a kick up the virtual rear is in order for me to get blogging properly, so here goes.
BEHOLD! My list of Happy Fool Singalong Songs!
1: J. Geils Band – Centrefold – I defy anyone to resist singing along to the ‘Naa naa na na na na’ bit.
2: The Shamen – Ebenezer Goode – Yes, sad 90s tat, but I learnt every word when I was in high school.
3: Led Zeppelin – Rock & Roll – Simply classic feelgood driving music.
4: a-ha – The Living Daylights – Being a Bond fan, this one is high on the 007 themes list.
5: Stevie Wonder – Superstition – I always sing this, and I always have to make up the words.
6: James Brown – I Feel Good – If only for the “When I hold you in my aaaaaaaaarms” bit.
7: The Darkness – I Believe in a Thing Called Love – Yes I sing this, and yes I can hit ALL the notes!
8: E.M.F. – Unbelievable – Another musical landmark from my youth!
9: Third Day – Still Listening – Raw Southern energy and I love it, although some other TD stuff comes close!
10: Bon Jovi – Wanted: Dead or Alive – the first song I learnt on guitar, I sing it EVERY time and I even sing the solo.
So there you have it. BTW, this does not in any way reflect the contents of my iTunes library. It’s just the stuff I can’t help singing to!
Go on then… let me have your faves too!
Well, what can I say? What an awesome and challenging weekend!
I’m part of a non-denominational christian organisation here on the Isle of Lewis called “Stand in the Gap” which, amidst a packed programme, this year decided to put on a youth conference for the first time.
One of our team, Robert, got in contact with Nigel James – A guy from Cardiff in Wales who heads up “Ignite“- a Nationwide youth ministry encouraging young people to enter into a deeper commitment to God. He also spends a lot of time on the road as a tour pastor for one of my favourite bands, Third Day. As you can imagine, we were really excited to have him come see us on our dinky little island!
The conference kicked off on Friday night with Nigel leading 8 sessions over the whole weekend and all the young people making the Ignite declaration on the Saturday afternoon. It was a really powerful time and a time when it was apparent that God was doing things in people’s hearts. Saturday was topped off by an Xtreme Event, with our band Tomorrow Today being supported ably by Sunrise Not Secular. Not only that, but sections of the event were filmed by MacTV for use in a programme about Christian Rock music which I’ll be presenting.
A busy weekend for all of us, and especially poor Nigel, who’s got to get back to Cardiff today before heading straight back on the road with Third Day in the States! I just want to thank Nigel for being with us this weekend and for sharing the message with the kids here, and with us old fogeys too! God was moving in an amazing way and it was a delight and a privilege to be involved in it.
My wife is a hidden poet. She writes, and some of it deserves a wider audience. I thought you might like to read this one. It spoke to me and I think it might speak to you too…
Silence is interrupted by the sound of the rain falling
Yet, O Lord I hear you calling.
You called me from the depths of darkness
Called me back to you.
“Hush now, my child. Hear the rain!
Now I’ve opened your ears
Like raindrops falling from the leaves
The sadness in your heart will catch the sun
Making colours of the rainbow.
Remember my promise.
In this, learn your tears are turned to glorious colours
For the world to see.
Now I have opened your eyes.
When the wind blows
The leaves are scattered.
Man gathers those leaves
Yet they are dead
But the seeds in the fruit will grow
And manifest themselves in your heart.
My fruitful child,
Now I have opened your heart.
Listen to the birds’ song
They sing always; pleasing to your ears.
Look what I have done for you.
I have given you a voice.
Sing my praises
As heaven rejoices with you.
Speak my Name on your lips.
I am the Truth.
My child, you are my daughter.
I see your heart.
(How beautiful you have become!)
When you walk with me
You shine, you love, you see
And your heart sings!
Look what I have done for you!
With my hand in yours
You are no longer in the wrong direction.
You’re coming closer to me.
Walk with me forever
And you shall live.
See my face,
Your Father xxx”
“The true children of God are those who let God’s Spirit lead them…” Romans 8 v14